hiiiii :D ★ i'm newgen but pretty cool (and smart and funny and cute and adorable) ★ ★ get LOUD‼️‼️ ★ GET CRAZY‼️‼️ ★ loves raves (but hasnt been to one yet)★ ★ 3DS FC: 4183-9047-9648, EN/FR, OG Homebrew dev. lovin tha shrimp!!!! ★ ★ Mobile game enjoyer!! FGO, CRK, HSR, Unite, DGS ★
The worst and best, day for many, many humans alike. Personally, I have to train. I have to get my body in tip-top shape. Last year proved to me that time is slipping faster than I can catch up, but with constant routine and grinding, the body I want will finally be mine. No more wishing I was something else, someone else, not this year.
As silly as it may seem, there is a mental Goku. He is outweighing Vegeta. He believes in me in a way that nothing else ever has, and I don't want to let him down. I will train every single day, until July 25th. This is a promise to myself. I know I'll miss a few days, but that's okay, I don't want to on purpose. I want the body I should have come with. But that's okay too, my determination outweighs any of this. Saving money, eating right, exercising well, and having fun. That is the way I choose to live.
A Couple stickers me and freinds have made over the past few weeks. I've been in a drawing drought due to a lack of confidence, but hopefully it'll pass soon. Just wanted to post them because i think they're silly and fun.
Shot was taken yesterday before work (12/28, 6:18PM, 4.5MG Shot.), felt a little miserable. Got home today, slept early. Woke up, took a shower, and felt insanely better. No much of an update, but i did get very very nervous doing The Shot again. TEQ LR [Relentlessly Surging Power] (Wrathful) Broly's active OST got me through it. I think, associating a different song that i like makes it more bearable.
This time, it really bugged me, since it felt expressly more personal than the last two. I had to push it in twice, in a thinner part of my leg. Every push i felt it tear muscle and inner flesh, it was excruciating but also strangely enjoyable. I have no idea how to explain that feeling. Mixed. Anyways, Reader, I have to go to work soon. Hopefully, you have a good day today.
The journey to the perfect body will be realized in the next six months.
The needles it got were the wrong size the first time: 3ML instead of 1ML. Now it has a box of these sitting in its room, staring over to remind it of a silly mistake. It wishes it could return these. What if the roommates see? What will they think, that it's doing illegal drugs? (Well, it is, but you know what it means, Reader.)
One inch of steel needle really makes you respect how big an inch is when it's on something else. Scary.
It has been done. The first two injections, all by myself. 12/13 and 12/20, respectively. The first time, I think I might have messed up, because the body bled a lot and felt like trying to control a feral beast for the next week. The second time, there was hardly any. Felt like a pinprick, too. The feeling is weirdly just as I imagined it, but... strangely addicting? I don't know. Stabbing this body again, watching, feeling a needle push its way through our own flesh, it's a very mixed bag of emotions for it and me. The anxiety is intense, but once it's past that, I'm totally into it—sort of addicting.
The first measured dose was 2.3MG, the second was 4MG. That could explain why i felt so off during the initial phase, but I think it's just because of the difference and lack of HRT this body has had access to in the past month or so. Plus, a week without doing my usual Spray-On Gender technique felt weird, since I have conditioned myself never to forget.
December is usually a month of promises for a lot of people, and yet again, this body yearns for me to condition it to be in the state it wants. To a better me, a better future, and for all the people to whom this mind has grown attached.
The package has been delayed. Again. It is now coming in on the tenth, as opposed to the eighth. This world is full of uncertainties and nerve wracking events that feel unfair.
Needles Obtained. Can't lie, It gets really nervous holding the box for them. There's a hundred of them, along with the pain relief prep pads. It knows that this was a long time coming, buying these and doing injections is way more convenient and easier overall, but the relationship with sharps objects and It's flesh isn't a good one...
crazy that we have domesticated normalized small robots programmed them to be so sensitive they leak at the sight of a human and we use them every single day
:btr_ikuyo_panic: 
:aftonsparv: 
★